Unbound Ambitions; Career. Relationships. Wellbeing

Redefining Self-Care

• Penelope Magoulianiti • Season 2 • Episode 4

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Ever feel like self-care is a luxury you can't afford to indulge in?

We challenge these misconceptions in our latest episode of Unbound Ambitions. We'll show you how self-care is far from selfish; it's the passport to better performance at work, higher emotional intelligence, and healthier relationships. You'll learn that balancing life isn't a matter of resources but about dedicating time to rest and recharge.

In the second half, we'll dispel myths about successful women having it all. If you've bought into the notion that a thriving career and fulfilling relationships are mutually exclusive, we'll show you a new perspective. Learn about micro self-care - small, intentional actions that can have a huge impact on your well-being.

If you're feeling stretched thin and need strategies to rejuvenate your life, this is your wake-up call. Tune in; let's redefine self-care and make it a cornerstone for success and relationships!

During the episode, I mentioned a free masterclass you can watch to learn more about creating better connections with yourself, your partner, and others. You can watch it here.

Enjoy.

I would like to invite you to a conversation with me. You can book your complimentary spot here.

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Penelope Magoulianiti:

Welcome to Unbound Ambitions. My name is Pinnello Pimegullanetti and this is a podcast for success-driven women. I work with women who want to excel in their careers and relationships without struggle or sacrifice. I go to the heart of the problem and I'm not afraid to challenge my clients to face the truth. What I know about success and connection is that both require a new way of doing things. I coach Unbound Ambitions. Life doesn't have to be either or. When you change your perspective, your whole world will shift. It can happen easily, and this podcast is about helping you unbound yourself from limiting perspectives. Hello and welcome.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Today we are talking about self-care. We hear about the importance of self-care all the time. Experts tell us about its importance and why we should never neglect our self-care. And still, self-care. For so many of us, it's the last thing that we have on our list of importance. We tell ourselves we don't have time. We convince ourselves that we will do it and never get around it. And then we are dealing with the consequences, because there are consequences. So in this episode, I want to discuss self-care in the concept of how self-care helps us to become better leaders, better professionals and better partners mothers, friends.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Self-care is an essential practice for maintaining a balanced and fulfilling life. I have developed a whole training around discovering how balanced your life is, and you can watch it at www. penelopemagoulianiti. com/ gift. When you do watch it and do the evaluation, you will see that the imbalance isn't created by a lack of skills or lack of knowledge, or even lack of resources, but by the lack of devoting time to yourself and your own needs. Self-care is, after all, the conscious act of engaging in activities that promote overall well-being and personal health. But we don't value it much because there are many myths around self-care, and one is the misconception of self-care being time-consuming, selfish or indulgent. Have you ever heard about that myth of self-care means I am selfish If I take time for myself. I am selfish, I am procrastinating, and so many experts say otherwise. Daniel Goleman, a psychologist known for his work on emotional intelligence, emphasized that self-awareness, a component of emotional intelligence, is reinforced through self-care practices. So we become more self-aware, we have more emotional intelligence in our life when we self-care. Another study made by the American Institute of Stress has integrated the stress reduction through self-care can result in better workplace performance.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

And self-care has four parts. One is the physical part, where it comes the exercise, the nutrition, the sleep, rest. Second, emotional is the stress management, the emotional regulation, the self-compassion we have when we are rested. Intellectual is the third part. It's the continuous learning, creativity, curiosity and, lastly, the spiritual part is when we are connecting with a larger purpose, when we do meditation, mindfulness, when we practice mindfulness.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Self-care is a holistic approach, it's not an once-off approach, and when we don't look after ourselves, it's a fact that it will have an impact on our professionalism and a great impact on our personal relationships. When we don't take short breaks, for example, when we don't meditate or go for short walks, all this can contribute to improve our concentration, to have better decision-making at work and also to become more resilient during challenging situations. In other words, the more time we devote to looking after ourselves, the better leaders we will become, and by leaders I don't mean just work. We are leaders, and in our personal lives as well. It's crazy. It is crazy. We usually neglect to look after ourselves because we want to give our all to our job, to our role and our family. But the truth is, if we give equal and I will repeat the word if we give equal attention to both work and self-care, then we will become the leaders that we want, the partners and the parents we wish we can be, without killing ourselves at the same time.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

One of my clients sent me a message the other day telling me how wonderful she feels. What she did was she took her kid to an activity and, instead of sitting down and catching up on work while she was waiting something that she always done she chose to go and sit in a beautiful cafeteria. She had a glass of wine and enjoyed an hour of rest while she was waiting for her boy to finish. This is what I am talking about Little acts. Become resourceful, as my client did, and devote time to rest and recharge. You could meditate for half an hour or even for 10 minutes. You could go for a walk for 10 minutes, or you could sit and listen to music while you are enjoying a cup of coffee or a glass of wine. If you are about to go to a meeting and you feel slightly stressed or your mind wanders in a million directions, take some deep breaths or do some deep breathing exercises. It will ground you, it will calm your mind and you will be more present and efficient during your meeting.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

And you must know by now that poor self-care impacts our relationships negatively. Let me tell you about Sarah. Sarah works as a marketing executive and she has two children. She has a demanding job, often working late into the evenings and sometimes on weekends, and with all these high-pressure deadlines and her desire to climb the corporate ladder, sarah has little time for herself. So what she does? She skips meals or ops for the fast food. She neglects exercise and averages only about 5 hours of sleep per night. Her weekends, nothing different. Rather than offering a break to herself, usually they are filled with errands and children's activities.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

And this is the life that many of us lead. Not only Sarah, but many, many women lead this life and the consequences on the relationship with our partners can be strained. Why? Because in the past you might have used to have weekly date nights, as Sarah did, but due to work commitments you had to cancel, or you may have a deadline and you need to catch up on work, and due to the heavy workload, you may find yourself being distracted or irritable, which eventually will lead to arguments. The partner may feel neglected and miss the connection they once shared with you.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

But it doesn't stop there. There is an impact on the relationship with your children if you have any tiredness, stress and lack of sleep cause little patience for the children's stories about their days or even their request for help with their homework. Because we are not present, kids tend to find it more difficult to grab our attention, and if we don't give it to them willingly because we are so preoccupied with work, they will find a way to cause us to stop and pay attention. They might do something at school, they may drop their marks, anything to tell us hey, I'm also here. Poor self care habits can lead to a family that feels disconnected disconnected from the husband, disconnected from the kids, and the kids may miss the engaged and energetic mother they once had and they start to feel like they can't rely on her for emotional support.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Can you see how the neglect of self care can ripple outwards, affecting not just us but also the people around us? So what do I do? Do I have to quit my job? Do I have to quit a career that I work so hard? Remember, sacrificing something we love won't necessarily give us what we want. What we can do is to change the way we do things. We are busy, I know, and we believe that we can't afford hours and hours to devote on self-care, not when we have so many things piled up daily, and that's why I would like to introduce you to the concept of micro self-care. Have you ever heard this? Micro self-care, which is nothing else than small actions which bring big impacts?

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Do you feel, let's just say, stressed and don't have time to calm your mind? Do a two-minute meditation. Even a short meditation, can reset your mood and stress level. Some apps offer guided sessions to fit in quick meditation breaks, but what you have to do is just stand still. Sit still, close your eyes and take some deep breaths. Deep, slow breaths. For two minutes, it's more than enough to calm your mind. Another way of micro self-care is mindful sips. Use drinking water or tea as a moment of mindfulness. Concentrate on the temperature, the taste and the sensation of the liquid, which can serve as a brief mental break.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Power naps is another quick way to recharge. A 10-20-minute power nap can boost alertness and performance without interfering with nighttime sleep. Take a moment to appreciate your achievements or progress on a task, no matter how small. This can boost self-esteem and motivation. Just sit down and, for a couple of minutes, go through mentally what you have done up to this point. Say well done to yourself, appreciate your hard work. Another way is connection snippets. What's this? Send a quick text or maybe a brief call to your partner I love you and I miss you, or maybe I am thinking of you. This will take you no more than, let's just say, a minute to write and send the message, but when he receives it he will feel that you are thinking of him, that you want your relationship to last, that you love him, and it will make such a difference in your relationship. When you are feeling overwhelmed, pause and focus solely on your breath for five cycles, inhaling and exhaling slowly. This can't be grounding and also reduce anxiety.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

These micro self-care practices can collectively lead to significant improvements in well-being, mental health and your overall life satisfaction. And then the best thing is that they don't take much of your time, and I know that during the day we face time constraints. We have work pressure, we have family obligations, which they can be possible barriers in our attempts to include self-care in our daily routine. Even with micro self-care, if you don't plan it or if you don't make it part of your daily practice, you won't stick to it, even if it's just two minutes, and I'm sure you I have seen this before in your life, something which takes too little of your time two minutes, five minutes and you still don't do it because you don't commit to it. So if you want to add the micro self care in your life, you need to add it in your calendar. You need to include these short breaks in your calendar, like you include anything else in your calendar, and you need to get serious about it.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Self care is a lifestyle adjustment process. You must assess your lifestyle choices and this comes down to making changes to your diet, exercise and sleep habits to support your overall health. Start with micro self care and then, slowly, slowly, the more relaxed you will feel, you will be able to adding more and more changes in your lifestyle. Refrain self care. Shift your perception of self care from a luxury to a necessity. Refrain how you think it. Recognize that taking care of yourself is not selfish. It's an essential part of caring for yourself and others.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Effectively Challenge the social norms. Actively push back against the notion that being busy is a batch of honor. So many of us are. We are so proud because we are so busy. Instead, celebrate downtime and the accomplishments that come from being well rested and mentally clear. Trust me, when you take time to rest, you will achieve more in less time, because a rested mind is more productive and does less mistakes. Set realistic expectations. Acknowledge that you can do everything at once and this is when prioritizing self care means that sometimes other tasks must wait, and that's okay and communicate openly. Discuss your self-care needs with your partner, with your kids, with your friends and colleagues. Open communication can help set and manage expectations. It can also help reduce guilt. When you take time for yourself and the best part when you start communicating what you do, more people will follow. The more rested you are, the better leader and partner you become.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Self-care it must be part of your daily routine, not an add-on. In the same way you brush your teeth to keep them strong and healthy, you must also devote time to daily rest so you keep yourself strong, resilient and happy. And I would like to leave you today with a challenge. If you had to commit to one new self-care practice that you will do diligently every single day, what would that be? Will it be one of the concepts that I've described in the micro self-care concept? Will it be something different? Decide on one thing that you are going to do. Put it in your calendar, make it non-negotiable and stick to it from now on. You will be amazed at how much better you will feel with one single action, and this is what I had for you today. I would love to hear from you. Send me a message, dm me or even leave a review for this podcast. I will be so grateful.

Penelope Magoulianiti:

Go ahead and watch the free training I have on the subject of changing the relationship you have with yourself, your partner and others. You can watch it at www. penelope magoulianiti. com/ gift and until next week, much love. There are several myths and misconceptions that exist about women who want to have successful careers and maintain fulfilling and beautiful relationships, and this is what I love to do. I love to debunk these myths, to coach and guide women to a new way of thinking and doing. If you're interested in learning more about my work, I would like to invite you to a conversation. Go to www. penelope magoulianiti. com/lets talk to book your call.